Sexual Pleasure in Marriage

In Daily Devotional by Matt Cline

Bible Verse: “The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” (1Corinthians 7:3-5)

Scripture Reading: 1Corinthians 6

As we have looked at already this week, 1Corinthians 6 speaks to the covenantal relationship that God desires regarding our bodies and sex drives. This is relevant for single and married men because it teaches us a healthy view of sexuality, regardless of our relationship status.

The very next chapter, 1 Corinthians 7, speaks to this same thing, only now it’s between a husband and a wife.

Understanding first how to honour God with our bodies and sex drives will enable us to honour our spouses in the same way.

1 Corinthians 7:3-5 says, “The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.”

Notice that each spouse serves the other sexually. The marital duty isn’t simply pursuing intercourse or sexual release in marriage but rather serving your spouse sexually in a way that honours them and God.

God has authority over us and chooses to be endlessly loving, patient, and kind. He wants to give us pleasure (Psalm 16:11) and fulfill our hearts’ desires (Psalm 37:4). In giving us authority over our spouse’s body and vice versa, God instructs us to die to self and serve our spouse.

Today’s passage is sometimes abused by husbands who use it to force their spouses to submit to their sexual desires, but that is very different from what the passage says. Their body isn’t there for us to use for our pleasure, but rather, we have the authority that nobody else has to love them and touch them in a way that brings them pleasure, and vice versa.

In yielding the authority of our body to our spouse and honouring God with our bodies (1 Cor 6:20), there is no room for us to pursue sexual pleasure for ourselves alone.

There are questions about why the Bible isn’t explicit about masturbation, but when we understand God’s selfless design regarding sexuality, we see that there simply isn’t room to justify pursuing sexual pleasure for ourselves.

How can you love God and love your spouse with your sexuality today?

Prayer: Father, forgive me for where I have sought sexual pleasure for my own sake alone. Help me to live in the holiness that You have called me to.

Reflection: Give some thought to this question: what would it look like for you to live out 1Corinthains 7 perfectly in your life? What changes need to be made to get there?

If you or someone you know are struggling with sexual issues, we encourage you to reach out to Restored Ministries. Restored Ministries is for both men and women who wrestle with sexual addiction, betrayal, abuse and more.


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About
Matt Cline
Matt is the founder and director of Restored Ministries, focused on leading men and women out of sexual brokenness and into a life of freedom and impact. Internationally known as a leading speaker and coach on Biblical sexuality, he has seen countless lives radically changed around the world and has trained leaders to multiply the impact. His resources have reached thousands of people in over 120 countries and he regularly speaks at in-person and virtual events. He and his wife, Louise, live in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada with their two sons.
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Matt Cline
Matt is the founder and director of Restored Ministries, focused on leading men and women out of sexual brokenness and into a life of freedom and impact. Internationally known as a leading speaker and coach on Biblical sexuality, he has seen countless lives radically changed around the world and has trained leaders to multiply the impact. His resources have reached thousands of people in over 120 countries and he regularly speaks at in-person and virtual events. He and his wife, Louise, live in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada with their two sons.